I should have known it wasn't going to be a stellar day when my son opened my bedroom door at 6a.m. It's not unusal that he does this, except he usually opens my door and heads right for my bathroom. His older sister has commandeered the other bathroom, so he uses mine in the morning. He opened the door...and then just stood here. I squinted up at him in the light coming from the loft and asked him what the problem was.
"Something really really stinks in here"
"I don't smell anything" Which was true, as my nose was stuffed up.
"I'm tellin' ya....it's bad"
And with that he flipped on the light. Yep, there was a reason it was stinky. The dog had crapped all over the carpet. I got up and cleaned it up. Thank goodness it was the chunky crap variety and not the liquid crap that she'd deposited in nearly the same place a month or so ago. That event woke Lance and I from a deep sleep, each thinking that the other had passed some extraordinarily noxious fumes.
I wish I could say that I was done with animal effluvia for the day, but that would be wrong. The Teenagers have a habit of taking laundry from the dryer and depositing it on the small couch in the family room. For some reason this irritates the cats so much, that they pee on whatever clean laundry has been placed there. It's not so much that it's laundry, they simply don't LIKE anything on THEIR couches. We've learned this the hard way when I wanted to cover the creme leather of the family room furniture in red slipcovers. Everytime we put the covers on, they pee on them. But I digress.
I found my clean jeans on the small couch in the family room. Except they were wet with CAT PEE. I was not happy.
Later in the day I found a trail of cat turds along the row of guitars in the living room. I was not happy again.
My wonderfully patient husband reached his breaking point today when Ashley yelled that our beloved Bobo had just peed on the red slipcover that was on the big couch in the family room. He has declared death to all four legged animals in our home.
I've got him down to OUTSIDE BANISHMENT instead of death now. We think the animals are upset over the four new additions (kittens) that are getting more attention than they are. They are simply showing us how displeased they are.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go wash my jeans again.
"Something really really stinks in here"
"I don't smell anything" Which was true, as my nose was stuffed up.
"I'm tellin' ya....it's bad"
And with that he flipped on the light. Yep, there was a reason it was stinky. The dog had crapped all over the carpet. I got up and cleaned it up. Thank goodness it was the chunky crap variety and not the liquid crap that she'd deposited in nearly the same place a month or so ago. That event woke Lance and I from a deep sleep, each thinking that the other had passed some extraordinarily noxious fumes.
I wish I could say that I was done with animal effluvia for the day, but that would be wrong. The Teenagers have a habit of taking laundry from the dryer and depositing it on the small couch in the family room. For some reason this irritates the cats so much, that they pee on whatever clean laundry has been placed there. It's not so much that it's laundry, they simply don't LIKE anything on THEIR couches. We've learned this the hard way when I wanted to cover the creme leather of the family room furniture in red slipcovers. Everytime we put the covers on, they pee on them. But I digress.
I found my clean jeans on the small couch in the family room. Except they were wet with CAT PEE. I was not happy.
Later in the day I found a trail of cat turds along the row of guitars in the living room. I was not happy again.
My wonderfully patient husband reached his breaking point today when Ashley yelled that our beloved Bobo had just peed on the red slipcover that was on the big couch in the family room. He has declared death to all four legged animals in our home.
I've got him down to OUTSIDE BANISHMENT instead of death now. We think the animals are upset over the four new additions (kittens) that are getting more attention than they are. They are simply showing us how displeased they are.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go wash my jeans again.
Entirely your own fault.
ReplyDeleteVet.
Sleep.
vicus, you are a bad boy. I'd never kill my pets.
ReplyDeleteOh Man! Although how funny is the whole cat/couch thing...obviously funnier to me, but there you go.
ReplyDeleteYick. This is why I refuse to have a dog and my cat is outside (for the moment).
ReplyDeleteI remember having a kitten... I used to have Zeus, he was phsychotic and attacked everything :) Sadly he got squished by a car before even reaching full adulthood. I miss having a psycho kitten!
ReplyDeleteSounds just like our cats. Anything on the floor gets peed on. We've learned to pick up everything! I think Carmel taught Smokey to do that.
ReplyDeleteoh dear gawd.
ReplyDelete