Skip to main content

Posts

Showing posts from 2012

Sadistic Muse

“Tears are words that need to be written.” - Paul Coehlo

Smart man. Excellent writer. A friend of mine on FB shared his picture and this quote, and it resonated with me. I often find I write best when I am in distress. It's as though my muse needs my pain to be called forth.

Ah, what a sadist, my muse.

Christmas this year made me feel a bit off kilter---but not in a bad way. Ok, I did have a horrible case of vertigo which began Thursday night while hubby and I were out on a date. :::gasp::: Yes, we took our annual date. I thought I was managing quite nicely, he told me he thought I'd taken drugs. I guess what I hear about people drinking and trying desperately to act sober must be true. You don't fool anyone. So I've been on some drugs to help me defeat the vertigo, which make me sleepy. Apparently I passed out and missed most of Christmas Eve at my sister's house . Yay me!

On Christmas day we had the sister missionaries over for dinner so they could S…

Never Give Up, Never Give In...

"You're ridiculous!!!!", my 14 year old daughter sneered at me. "Why are you SO over protective??"

We'd just spent a chilly five minutes on the porch arguing. She had refused to hand over her precious cell phone, and I wasn't allowing her to open the door and go into the warmth until she had done so. She asked me how long I was going to keep her phone. I told her two days.

"NO!"
"Hand it to me."

"NO! I don't see why I have to!!"

She is fourteen years old, she probably didn't see the reasoning behind my demand she turn over her cell phone. But it's my job to teach her.

"If you don't hand it to me, you're going to lose it for longer than two days."
"NO!!"
"Trust me, I mean it. Give it to me."
"NO!!!!!!!
"Fine, you've lost it for a week now."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Yes."
"FINE!", she bellowed at me as she thrust the phone int…

Sandy Hook

I was sitting in a dark room Friday morning when my phone buzzed. I looked at the alert and CNN informed me that there had been a shooter at a school in Connecticut. Closing my phone, I looked up to heaven and said a prayer in my heart for those in harms way. I had no idea of the scale of this tragedy at that moment. I was at Seattle Children's Hospital watching the brain waves of my youngest child as they moved across the monitor during her EEG. She was sleeping peacefully, all wrapped up in white gauze with wires protruding out of bandages. I gave a sigh and silently thanked my Father in Heaven that I knew where my child was and that she was safe.

As the day progressed, more of the tragedy came to light. I wept for the families, the children, the first responders who would have to process this unimaginable horror. Openly crying in front of my children and hugging them each time they came near me. I work in our school district. This hits close to home.

What happened at

Nad Whacking

We did it. Well, WE didn't do it, our vet did.

He wasn't too thrilled to be taken somewhere in the kitty carrier though.



Professor Tubbington had his lil nuggets removed yesterday. This will take care of a few things, namely his aggressive behavior with the other cats, his tomcat tail (EW) and his desire to do his business anywhere he feels like it. Due to those three issues, he's been an outdoor kitty since the summer. Plus, we are being responsible kitty owners by taking him out of the gene pool. And it makes Alli very happy to have her baby back in her arms and snuggling with her at night.

Bobo is not thrilled. Now he's no longer top of the cat heap in the house. He has to share. He's not big on sharing. He'll just have to adjust.

My girl Cassie isn't doing too well. We're not quite sure what's going on with her. We were told that all her 'tumors' were benign, but that doesn't mean they aren't affecting her someho…

Festival of The Nativities

Yesterday afternoon we took Ashley and Alli over to Belluvue Festival of The Nativities and saw something so beautiful it touched our hearts. There were over 500 nativity scenes, representing over 44 countries, set up in the Stake Center behind the Temple. It was interesting to see the unique cultural differences in each nativity.

It was incredibly touching. I took some pictures... I hope you're touched by them as well. Here are my two youngest and most beautiful daughters. Ashley Rose and Allison Marie. Oh how I love these girls. Alli was the one who really wanted to see all of the nativities. She LOVES Christmas so very much.

And here are the nativities...







































My apologies for the poor quality of the photos. There were over a hundred lighted Christmas trees...lights everywhere. One room was called The Christ Room. Paintings, drawings, statues and other unique items outlining the life of Christ were set in that room. I teared up as I walked through the line and came …

Kidnapping and Running Away

This is my foot. This is my foot covered in the sand of Waimea Beach. Sigh.

I kidnapped my oldest daughter, nearly-literally, and whisked her away to Hawaii for a about a week. You see, I had no choice. I had to do it. It's a long and sad and complicated story, but the Readers Digest version is this: THERE WILL BE NO WEDDING.

Not to that man, at any rate. Family Intervention works.

Now, I know there are probably some out there wondering how I managed to afford this spur of the moment kidnapping. You're right, we were struggling mightily for a few months after Lance's accident. You really can't live on disability, but with the help of the church and friends and people who wanted to remain anonymous (You are wonderful and kind and all things good in the universe), we made it through. So thank you from the bottom of our hearts and please don't send us money. Help someone else now. The reason I could do this is because I received a small settlement. I d…

Thank you CATDOAH

As I've stated before, I have a condition called, "Cries At The Drop of a Hat" Or, CATDOAH. Sounds like a country dance, doesn't it?

"All right everybody! Grab yer partner tight and CATDOAH!"

Sadly, my condition is not that fun.

I received a note in the mail that made my CATDOAH break out and break out BAD. Or good, depending on your POV. That's 'point of view' for those who say IDK. Which means, 'I don't know'. Yeah, I know. I try to keep up on all the cool teen-speak. I might just have a handle on it by the time they've all grown and left the nest. Then it will be PLUDHK! (Party Like You Don't Have Kids), but we do and so we don't. Party, I mean. It's been a long time.

Sigh

Anyway, back to the CATDOAH caused by this card from a sister in my ward. In the first place, I'm pretty sure I didn't deserve what she said. Oh, it was nice. Very nice. Nice in the extreme and very complimentary. Which…

She's Fourteen. Watch Out World!

My baby turned 14 on Saturday. Fourteen. Four-teen. Wow. I know the next statement should be the age old question, "how did this happen?". Wasn't it just yesterday they were telling me my baby was dying and racing me into the operating room to crash me and rip her from my body in order to save her life. A hasty priesthood blessing and the assurance that all would be well and I was rendered unconscious.

And all was well. IS well, after a manner of speaking. While her disability is evident to some, it isn't to others. She compensates well. Very well. Sometimes---just sometimes---I get a little catch in my heart when I see her right hand all twisted and bent, or watch her gait as she walks---but walk she does. No wheelchair or walker needed, thankyouverymuch. But sometimes.....just....sometimes.....and I never ever let her see my tears over her physical disabilities.

Who knew motherhood could be so tender and full of anguish and hopeful all at the same t…
Waiting Patiently on the Lord

Am I enduring well
Lord
Am I
Sometimes it's hard to tell
I'm not crying as much
is that progress
I don't know
My heart is lighter
wings of prayer
lifting me up
lighting my way
Am I enduring well
Lord
Am I
Is chasing the painful thought away and out
is that enduring well?
If I don't see her face in my heart
Is that enduring well
I believe I said yes to this
Only I don't remember
Would I have
If I'd known the heartache
the pain
the burning tears and the sleepless nights
Would I have been so eager
Yes, Lord
I'll take this child
Give her to me
No one will understand her
I will
Will I?
Am I enduring well
Lord
Am I
I'm weary with worry
Who will love her
Who will love him
Who is this child, Lord
Am I enduring well
Lord
Am I
Am I

Chavez, Capriles, and Hope

This weekend was, for me, a mixed bag. On the one hand, I was lifted and spiritually fed by listening to General Conference from Salt Lake City. Words of counsel, of wisdom and of hope, from our beloved Apostles and Prophet. Good men all.

And on the other hand, the voting in Venezuela went awry---probably with the help of Chavez and his minions. He has done such damage to my beloved Venezuela. My heart weeps for my friends there. I pray there is no violence. It's bad enough as it is to live there and suffer one of the highest murder rates in the world. You cannot walk the streets without fear of robbery or worse.

It's a very sad day for Venezuela.



Tomorrow I will make arepas and Platanos fritos and carraotas negras and pray that Venezuela will one day be free.

Family Home Evening

Last night was Family Home Evening at our house. This is a Monday night thing---we get together as a family. We sing songs, have a lesson, talk about the week and share scriptures. Sometimes we have a game, but not generally.

Last night, my Allison gave the lesson. It was on gratitude. I'm pretty sure she didn't read my last blog post, so this was awesome in and of itself. She gave a beautiful lesson and then asked each one of us to name five things were were grateful for. There were the usual, 'grateful for my family' etc, but two things stood out to me.

When Ashley was naming the five things she was most thankful for---she said, "I'm grateful for my disability. It's made me the person I'm supposed to be."

I got all teary eyed. (For those of you that don't know, she had a stroke in the womb and has cerebral palsy on her right side). Isn't it wonderful that a catastrophic event that still at times brings pain to the heart of a…

Over active tear ducts

Sundays are always special days for me---going to church and feeling the fellowship there. Being among good people, with caring hearts. My heart was full today, as I sat in Sacrament meeting and the hymns played. My heart was so full that it over-filled my eyes and spilled down my face.

I could not stop crying. They were not tears of despair. They were part heartfelt prayer of gratitude for my blessings and part sorrow at circumstances beyond my control. We have been incredibly blessed these past two months. One elderly sister was making a dinner for family---and made an extra pan of it for someone, but she didn't know who. It was for us. She had prayed that morning that she might be of service to someone in need. It was on a night where I'd spent about 12 hours working in the house, trying to fit the four of us into just the upstairs of the house. I was wiped out, exhausted to the point of tears (I have very weak tear ducts)and nearly unable to stand one more minut…

Puppies and Incisions and Interpreting Against the Rules

It's Sunday night. Go time. Get ready to start the week. I spent all day in bed---no, I really did. Yesterday wore me out. We moved Allison into our room, moved us into her room and moved Ashley into our room. Our former room. Now Alli and Ash are sharing our big room and we have the itty bitty room. Stephanie will also be moving into the room with her sisters.

We'll see how long that lasts.

Three girls in one room + two sinks+one shower= future tirades I can already hear from here.

I hope and pray this teaches them compassion, patience, sharing, caring and that they come out on the other side of this experience better human beings. I will do my very best to facilitate this goal. In the mean time, wheeeeee!

Week One down of school and work (for me) It felt like a month. By the time Friday rolled around I was ready to drop. And drop I did. For a whole ten minutes. Then I got up and took Alli to meet her friends at the football game. (Go Thunderbirds!) Then I sur…

My name is not Job....

But I play him on TV


Just kidding. I don't play anyone on TV, although I was once told I have a Doppelgänger in England who is an actress. I'm not sure what this says about the standards of British Television, but to each their own.

I am not Job, of Bible fame. I'm actually quite fine. I'm better than fine, I am humbled and grateful and thankful. There have been so many prayers lifted up on our behalf, so much service given willingly and kindly and .....we have been incredibly blessed. Overcome with the kindness and goodness of people.

Over 30 years ago, I served as a Relief Society President in a Spanish Branch of the church, after my mission to Venezuela. I met a young man there, his name was Mark Body. He married a cute little blond girl, I eventually married a tall blond guy and we went our separate ways. We'd see each other around, or hear of each others families, but we didn't live near each others family until Facebook reconnected Mark's …