Some people think I write too much. Or over share when I do write. Some don't think I write enough and others, meh. They simply don't care.
I've developed a thick skin over my writing. I wrote newspaper columns for about seven years as a freelance columnist and even had a steady writing gig for two papers for five years. That was both fun and tedious. One effect it had on me was that I didn't look at everyday life in the same way. I was more observant. When something would happen in front of me, my first thought was how to put that to ink.
Now, not so much.
Except last night when my husband said he'd had the 'best breakfast cupcake that morning' and it took me a while to figure out he was in fact referencing a muffin. I immediately wanted to write about it. It was amusing, spontaneous and downright funny.
I'm not sure I have a lot of those experiences lately. When my children were younger, sure. Nearly every day there was a catastrophe that could be turned into column fodder or a silly event that begged to be written about. Nowadays it's not the same. I work outside of the home mostly now. The things I see and work with, I cannot write about because these are highly confidential issues and in reality, there's not much humor in any of the situations. Sadness, horror and despair are the order of the day for many of the people I help and there's no way to turn any of that into lighter reading fare. I wouldn't even try.
I do feel a sense of accomplishment in my work. I feel like I'm making a difference in people's lives and that in turn bolsters my self-esteem and confidence. In forgetting myself in helping others, I find myself. Hmmm...that sounds familiar. I know the scriptures talk about that when we serve our fellow man we are only serving our God. (Mosiah 2:14)
I try to see everyone as a son or daughter of God. As my brothers and sisters. It's not always easy so I ask for help when I pray that I can see each person I meet as God sees them. It's been an amazing change for me and my view of those around me.
Everyone has issues, problems, joys, sorrows, burdens. Sometimes life is extremely difficult and stressful. We're aging and as we do our health suffers, we lose dear friends and I think we examine our lives more intensely to see what we've accomplished, where we've made mistakes, how we've corrected them or if we haven't made things right we feel a stronger desire to do so. To free the conscience and cleanse the soul.
I've made my share of mistakes. Plenty. I think back sometimes and wonder who the blazes that woman was...what was she thinking. I don't know. What I do know is that staying on the right path, seeking the light, the truth, keeping close to the spirit and reading the scriptures truly does bring peace. Gratitude for a kind, loving husband who has a forgiving heart and a very generous soul, who loves me no matter what is perhaps one of the greatest gifts I've been given.
I see I've been rambling again. One thing though, if I've ever done something to hurt your feelings, or cause you to be offended, or led you down a wrong path. I'm sorry. My apologies. I wish that I could speak to you in person, but this will have to do for now.
Ah yes, the ramblings of a person with a bit too much free time on a Saturday morning after cleaning the house like a madwoman on RedBull. (No, I did not drink a red bull)
Time for me to go. Apparently there is a cupcake festival in Mill Creek we have to visit.
More over sharing to come at a later date :)