Skip to main content

Why I cried in church today

Today, as is our custom on the Sabbath, we loaded what children we could round up and headed to our chapel. I know some think we are odd and even deluded to participate in such activities. We don't. We try to go each and every Sunday, as well as participating in a few church-related activities during the week.

No, the reason I cried today has nothing to do with the amount of time we spend at church. I like being there, with other people of faith and the fellowship and spirit that's always there bolsters me and carries me into the week feeling uplifted.

But I digress.

In the pew, we were sitting with Ashley on the end, then Lance, then Stephanie and Allison then me. Chris had to work so he wasn't with us today.

No, the sitting arrangement in our pew didn't make me cry--though I wouldn't have minded sitting next to my husband.

Alli and Steph have a sweet habit of cuddling...hugging and leaning on one another. At night we can hear them (they share the room off ours) laughing and giggling and yelling. It makes me smile.

As Alli leaned over to lay her head in Stephanie's lap, I placed my hand on Stephanie's hand, which was laying on Alli's shoulder. Stephanie's hands. So beautiful. Long, slender fingers, beautifully shaped nails that taper to the exquisite ends of her fingertips. I held her hand in mine---my pudgy old stubby hands---and I marveled that I'd had any part in this beauty.

Then, as sometimes happens, my memory flashed on Stephanie's hands as an infant. The way just placing my finger in her palm would cause her tiny fingers to curl around my single digit and hold tight.

I placed my pinky on her open palm and nothing happened. Her eyes met mine and she held my gaze. I smiled at her, looked down at my hand on hers, then I looked back into those startling blue eyes and my own green eyes started to fill.

No more tiny fingers curled over my own. She doesn't need to hold on that tight any longer.

She might not need that...but sometimes I do. Sometimes...I just do.

Comments

  1. beautiful...
    i was thinking, as we were sitting behind you today, how sweet your girls are with eachother.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm sniffing and need a tissue now.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Go ahead....tell me the truth :)

Popular posts from this blog

Wheeeeeeee!

Today I was awakened to the not-so-delightful sounds of enormous dump trucks, (you know the ones that are a dump truck and they haul a trailer behind?) dumping truck load after truck load of dirt behind my house. Then the most incredibly noisey and squeaky (do they not grease the tracks on those things??) grader began shoving the dirt and rocks around. I had to fight the urge to throw a can of WD40 over the fence to the driver. It wasn't even eight in the morning. It wasn't even 7:30 yet. So I reluctantly arose from my bed and cleaned up the kitchen. After it was spotless, I went back upstairs to my freeze-zone (the only room in the house with AC) to do some online banking and make calls to check on medical bills, etc. As I was finishing up, in walks my husband! At first I had a moment of Oh-no-he's-lost-his-job terror. Then it passed after he smiled. Seems they ran out of work for the day. Odd, but then that's Boeing. So hubby was roped into going school cloth

She's Something...

Most of you know that I've got four children. My eldest is seventeen. Oh heavens...how did that happen? Wasn't I just seventeen the other day? I'm sure I was.... Well, she's amazing. I know the majority of mothers have very high compliments to pay their children--and rightly so. However, my baby girl is astounding by anyone's standards. She is going to high school and college at the same time. In high school she's taking mostly AP (Advanced Placement) classes, which also count for college credits. She gets up at five a.m. every morning, goes to Seminary, then goes to school, she works four hours daily as an office manager at Winderemere Real Estate. She speaks Spanish, plays piano, guitar and flute. She goes to the gym daily and it shows. This was her yesterday. This is a picture I just took of her, after getting her braces put on. Now, having said that she is gifted and talented, I should ammend this post to tell you the following. She just got home

Peace Begins with You

In my readings this week, I came across a video of Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin. He gave a talk entitled, "Peace Within." Who doesn't want peace? Who doesn't crave peace within their soul? In their lives? In their hearts and in their homes? How often do we have complete peace? I'd say my answer would have to be that there isn't enough peace in my life, heart or home. It's not like I live in a warzone--I do not. I'm blessed to live in a nation where I have freedoms granted to me by the founding fathers and I do not risk being struck down by bombs or shot by snipers when I venture forth from my home. My neighborhood is relatively safe, so much so that I take solo walks. The peace I speak of is something different. It's the peace that can be with me no matter my circumstances. I crave that peace. Elder Wirthlin says that peace begins in the hearts of righteous individuals. How does it begin? With a relationship with our creator. In ferven