Thursday, December 16, 2010

Nativitatis apparatum interrupta

I was given some wonderful treats today---twice actually. The first was when my husband came home and brought me some goodies from my work. Today was my work Holiday luncheon. I couldn't go. I wish I could have but I did too much yesterday by going to the doc and then the hospital for my doppler exam on the busted up knee. Doc thought I had a blood clot because my leg is incredibly swollen and hard.

No blood clot. I'm so thankful my wonderful husband was there to hold my hand while the technician pressed the device into my bruised leg. It was unpleasant. Except for holding Lance's hand. I'm so grateful to have him.

So, today no party for me. However, my husband stopped in at my office and picked up several goodie bags that people in the office had given me. Such delights!

Then it dawned on me. I can't reciprocate. I have no way to do my usual Christmas baking frenzy and I feel so horrible about it. I always, always make tons of goodies for Christmas. I bake sugar cookies and spritz cookes, snowballs and sour cream cookies. I bake them to give away. This is the first year ever that I've not been able to do so.

All because of some rotten wood.

I'm frustrated. Nine days to Christmas and you know how many Christmas presents I've bought? One. No, two. My list is immense.

But I've gotten off topic. The subject was goodies. After the delivery of the goodies, dinner was delivered by a sister in the ward. Shannon made THE best cheesy taters, meatloaf and salad. PLUS, the huge tin of Christmas goodies.

Oh my goodness. Yummies. So yummy. All different shapes and sizes. My mouth was once again in a state of bliss.

And then it hit me again; I can't reciprocate.

I understand that in the grand scheme of things it's really not a big deal. It's not. I know. I get it.

And I'll be fine with it. I think I'm allowed a few moments of frustration. Also, I'm learning. All experiences are for our good. We learn, we grow and we come out on the other side of our trials all the better for them.

There. Frustration gone.

I've been decorating 30 stockings by writing names on them in glitter. They're for Christmas Eve. It's something I can do while sitting down with my leg elevated. I think they're very pretty.

Despite everything, I'm thankful I know that my Father in Heaven is aware of my heart--and the hearts and trials of my family. He's there for us and as we prepare to celebrate Christ's birth, I cannot help but say God is good.

1 comment:

  1. I am so sorry you are going through this...especially this time of year.

    When I was on bedrest with my last pregnancy my best friend/neighbor helped with my kids A LOT. She runs a preschool and she already had one of my kids in her class, but she took my youngest (at the time) as well, unpaid, for weeks. When I went to have Kai she took my three kids for three days, and cleaned my house, including changing my sheets. When I told her she was doing way too much she said, "I have been on bedrest three times. I have had people come to my house and scrub my toilets and mop my floors and it was torture to let someone do that for me. Now it is my turn to give back. I couldn't do anything then, so now is the time for me to give back. There will be a time in your life that you will be able to help someone like this."

    That has stuck with me and I have had opportunities since then to give back!

    Take the help while you need it and don't feel an ounce of guilt! You will heal and then you will be able to help someone else!

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