... And I know not how to get it back.
Today I was awakened to the not-so-delightful sounds of enormous dump trucks, (you know the ones that are a dump truck and they haul a trailer behind?) dumping truck load after truck load of dirt behind my house. Then the most incredibly noisey and squeaky (do they not grease the tracks on those things??) grader began shoving the dirt and rocks around. I had to fight the urge to throw a can of WD40 over the fence to the driver. It wasn't even eight in the morning. It wasn't even 7:30 yet. So I reluctantly arose from my bed and cleaned up the kitchen. After it was spotless, I went back upstairs to my freeze-zone (the only room in the house with AC) to do some online banking and make calls to check on medical bills, etc. As I was finishing up, in walks my husband! At first I had a moment of Oh-no-he's-lost-his-job terror. Then it passed after he smiled. Seems they ran out of work for the day. Odd, but then that's Boeing. So hubby was roped into going school cloth
Oh Pam!!! :( I am so sad for you! I have NOT been where you are...I can only imagine the kind of pain you're in. You're whole family.
ReplyDeleteI have a co-worker/friend whose daughter has gone pretty much the rounds as well. Married, two children, fourth or fifth time in rehab, I'm not sure. Just finished the current bit, and is determined to stay clean. She has lost one of the kids to previous boyfriend...but at least has visits. Almost lost the youngest...
I don't know how the mom does it. I would be like you...dying each time.
Can you go to the temple and sit in the celestial room?
I really wish I could just come ease your pain...
Just know that my thoughts and heart is with you. Heavenly Father is there, He really is, and somehow you will pull through this. I know it looks dark and impossible...but somehow it will be made right.
Take care... Could you email me your address? If you trust I won't send a stalker to your door...lol
spazwriter@yahoo.com